I can’t seem to make the right decisions. Well…at least not as fast I want to make them
I can walk into a convenience store with the intent of making a purchase, spend thirty minutes comparing two different products, place each of them back on the counter, and then walk out of the store without buying anything because I couldn’t make a final decision.
And it’s not like I haven’t tried to change my way of doing things.
I have tried repeating phrases such as:
Go for it. Do it.
Don’t overthink things.
Only to abandon everything and pick the option of no choice.
That’s been the story of my life for years
To over complicate things to the point where nothing gets done.
It’s a viciously draining cycle.
But as strange as it may sound, I have somehow been able to manage my life accordingly.
And how, you may ask? Well…it’s quite simple.
I give myself extra time to overthink.
If for example, I am having difficulty picking between writing a post on my anxieties or my self-loathing, I purposely give myself an extra day to select between my options, knowing well that I will probably settle on writing a post about the ways in which I contradict myself.
It’s honestly quite a fascinating process to witness.
And it’s not as if knowing about how I overthinking everything makes the process easier.
In fact, it seems to make things more intense during the moment.
I don’t really know how to explain it.
But the best way to describe my overthinking is to visualize yourself wearing headphones with the volume turned on high and then you suddenly hear the song that makes your heart race and it gets put on repeat for an unknown amount of time.
You may want to sing along. You may want to break out and dance. But you can’t. Because then others will look at you weirdly. So you have to restrain yourself. And you sit or stand still while all these background noises surround you. And people go on about their daily routine.
And you’re there. Trying your best to block out the noise that others can’t hear.
Over and over again.
For the small decisions and the big ones.
I can’t keep track of all the time that I lost engaging in this process.
But now I have simply learned to enjoy the music and hope for the best.
So when you walk into a store and see someone holding and looking at two different shampoos and they’re still comparing the two when you’re walking out of the store, don’t judge them.
Simply walk past and enjoy your day.